Few might think that, stuck out here at the arse end of the world, Kitchengardenjapan might be a fashionista. But nothing, Darlings, could be further from the truth. In fact, Deary, from our peachy arse-end, we don’t follow fashion, pah! We create it.

Trash those Browns! Bin those Blacks! And welcome a new Hot! Hot! Hot! era.

It’s our pleasure to introduce kitchengardenjapan’s  Must Have item of The Cold, 2012... (you may sashay as you read this)…

It’s Tribal.

It’s Spicy!

It’s Scorching!!!

Ladies and gentlemen, Madams, Missusers and Massuers, (please lay of the wolf-whistles) we give you… {drum roll please….}

Cayenne…

Kingofcoolkitchengardenjapan

Help!

<Or: Zen and The Art Of Orchard Maintainance>

Question: Why grow and tend fruit trees whose fruits you can’t eat? Ponder, whilst you suck on that particularly tart lemon.

Answer: Because, like lemons, and limes, the sum of yuzu’s parts is greater than it’s whole. Whole, a yuzu is a worthless thing, avoided even by famished New Year crows. But dissasemble it, yuuz it (har har), and these incredible, inedible orbs transforms into a Can’t Live Without winter fruit.

Past posts have shown some of these. You’ve got;

• Bath water addendums
• Jams
• Liquers (both of the above can then concoct yuzu miso)
• Cocktails
• Yuzu kousho

And also…

Tea.

Ahhhhh, tea… Ask any Briton: Nothing beats a good cuppa. Ironic, as tea plants are  impossible to cultivate on the Isles. As too, are yuzu. Not enough spring/summer heat and way too much rain.

But, here, on the same latitude as the south of France, facing The “Cold” of January and February, ’tis the season to pick the yuzu, and wrap hands around a warm, welcoming mug. Here’s the recipe:

You will need:

Equal weight of yuzu and rock sugar.

That’s it. Simply de-pip the yuzu, chop or squeeze the flesh, slice the peel and throw it together with the sugar. Leave in the fridge for about a week, giving the jar an occasional shake, and when it’s time for a brew, ladle a couple of teaspoons syrup and peel into your favorite cup. Just add hot water.

Tea time

Incredible. Inedible. Highly drinkable. Perhaps our favourite (important caveat coming) non alcoholic drink. More tea, vicar?

Toot Toot!

Kitchengardenjapan

In a mryiad of different ways, the sun is setting on Japan - especially in the countryside, where Nostalgia rules the waves and Myth dies hard.

That the countryside sometimes posseses a beauty fewer and fewer people see, chance moments like the one below become all the more precious.

A Shining Path

I want me a boat. I wanna paddle that line.

Gollumgardenjapan

I like sweet potatoes. I like the novel way of planting them; I like watching them grow and go wild; and I especially like harvesting them. Feels like being in Vegas. Or a pachinko palour. Yet I don’t really like eating them. They’re a bit too stodgy for this refined palate.

That was until kitchengardenjapan gained bragging rights to coming up with the best sweet potato recipe in the world, of all time, ever. This dish is a hit of monsterous proportions. Try it and weep

You will need:

• 2 medium sweet potatoes
• 2 chillies, deseeded
• 1 large yuzu (or 2 small)
• 1 teaspoon honey
• 1 clove of garlic.

Method:

Peel potatoes and slice into 2-3 mm rounds. Boil for 3 minutes. Drain and put them under a high-set grill for a further two or thee minutes.

Whilst the potatoes are cooking, mix together the juice of the yuzu with honey, finely slice the chilli, and crush and chop the garlic. Swizz it all together.

Take out the potatoes, arrange on a plate and drizzle the dressing over and you’re done. It tastes Thai and the aroma is something special to savour.

Enjoy hot or cold.

From low stodge to high gourmet in approximately 5 minutes. Ladies and Gentlemen, we have a winnnnnnneeerrr!

5 stars...

Kitchengardenjapan

Future historians, I imagine, shall look back on 2011 as a helluva year. Uprisings, downfalls, financial collapses, Tea parties, earthquakes and radiation to name but few of the landmarks. As I look back through this almanac/blog, I see none of that mentioned, rather itty bitty inconsequentia stuff that still makes me smile. Now 2012, allow me, in this tiny corner of the internet, the indulgence of reminice, and to list my dozen favourite posts of the past dozen months…

{March 7} My Darling. Introducing the new k-truck to the world

http://kitchengardenjapan.wordpress.com/2011/03/07/my-darling/

{March 25} An Arbour’s ‘Arbor. A post-tsunami mind ramble

http://kitchengardenjapan.wordpress.com/2011/03/25/an-%e2%80%98arbour%e2%80%99s-arbor/

{May 9} The Whispering Mountain. The Mountain. What It Is:

http://kitchengardenjapan.wordpress.com/2011/05/09/the-whispering-mountain/

{June 6} Growing Pains. How to score mulch big time. Featuring My Darling:

http://kitchengardenjapan.wordpress.com/2011/06/06/growing-pains/

{June 18} In Situ. A commentless post about making booze. The jar was uncorked on NYE, and all one can say is: “Wot a nice drop” (ants ‘n’ all):

http://kitchengardenjapan.wordpress.com/2011/06/18/in-situ/

{September 5} The Best Okra Recipe In The World, Of All Time, Ever. Exactly what it says. Pining now, in these cold months:

http://kitchengardenjapan.wordpress.com/2011/09/05/the-best-okra-recipe-in-the-world-of-all-time-ever/

{September 7} The Devil’s In The House Of The Rising Sun. Drinking garlic liquer. Once done, never forgotton:

http://kitchengardenjapan.wordpress.com/2011/09/07/the-devils-in-the-house-of-the-rising-sun/

{September 22} The Mother Business. A bean-festa starring stars, swords, and a merry “Toot Toot”:

http://kitchengardenjapan.wordpress.com/2011/09/22/the-mother-business/

{October 10} Flotsam. It’s What I Am. It’s also a great place to contemplate:

http://kitchengardenjapan.wordpress.com/2011/10/10/flotsam/

{October 13} Seasonal Delicacy: Akebi. Aboriginal. ‘Orrible:

http://kitchengardenjapan.wordpress.com/2011/10/13/seasonal-delicacy-akebi/

{October 23} For Sale. A Property Almost Bought:

http://kitchengardenjapan.wordpress.com/2011/10/23/for-sale/

{December 5} Christmas Lies, Threats & Terror. Reward for these dirt-lovin’ tree-huggers:

http://kitchengardenjapan.wordpress.com/2011/12/05/christmas-lies-threats-terror/

So That was the year that was. And now It’s the year It is. What 2012 will bring is anybody’s guess. Wishing all readers of kitchengardenjapan all the best for the coming year.

Cheers!

Clicking the link below, through the wizardry of Youtube, will take you to the orchard. Were I a little bit smarter, I’d have shot it before picking most of the citrus bare (pic)

Fruits of Labour

… but ho, hum.

If you do have any comments, please leave them over here rather than over there, as I don’t go there too often.

Season’s Greetings to all dirt-loving tree huggers throughout the world.

Link: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NuE1XEtUwXE

Kitchengardenjapan

NOT my two front teeth. What I really want is plot 3422 (1/2). I also wouldn’t mind the adjoining, more recently abandoned plot 3421-1 to turn it into the fantastic, gorgeous plot of land that is 3420.

Treasure Map

But there’s a hitch (isn’t there always?) And the hitch is The Law.

Japan has overly archaic, perverse laws about Land. And these plots, designated shigaiichichoseikuikki, are Off Limits to the average Tanaka. In a Catch 22 made more ironic by the fact that the coutryside here is dying on it’s feet, the only people who can buy this type of land are the landholders who are abandoning it in the first place. One must hold at least 2 are (about 600 tsubo) in order to aquire more land.

Izumi’s father has. Izumi’s father’s land, which I’ve spent the past 5 years reclaiming from precicely this abandon means he could purchase more plots, whereas we, the folk that have transformed What Was Wild into something akin to paradise, can not.

It’s a stinker, the only air-freshener in the room being the fact that “Pops” is willing to “lend” us his name. It’ll be his name on the deed, not mine. I’ll nominally be working – transforming again –  his land, not mine. That kinda jars…

Sigh. Let’s see what tomorrow brings. Santa, yoroshiku.

Kitchengardenjapan

Tonight, on this winter’s equinox, tradition-minded people up and down the country will be eating pumpkin and throwing yuzu in the bathwater. It’s a tradition said to stop one catching a cold.

It’s also a waste of yuzu.

Here, we’re making liquers. Yuzu liquers.

The process is exatly the same as for ume, or apricot, loquat or garlic; fruit, sugar, white liqour, and a lot of patience…

I’ll see you, my dear, in summer.

To sunny days ahead...

Cheers!

Kitchengardenjapan

Weeds.

The thing about orchards is they’re supposed to have trees, something distinctly lacking about this particular patch of land.

It did have lots of weeds, though. A lot of weeds. Nothing but, in fact. If we take this project on, it’s gonna be a 200 tsubo monster.

On the plus side, though, the land does come with million-dollar views…

"Orchard", w/ shed at left, views straight ahead.

“So, how much do you want for it?” I asked, all nonchalence.

“Make me an offer,” he said. Perhaps a bit too quickly for his own good…

Kitchengardenjapan

Part 3 of a nail-biting Greed for Trees…

**********

“Xanadu” has been found.

“I’ve got the map. It’s through the tunnel, then left, and left again. Up the mountain. You free tomorrow? Good. Bring your K-truck, it’s a narrow road. Four wheel drive? All the better…”

**********

Pacing…. Thinking… Plotting…

Kitchengardenjapan